Two to three years ago, after a typical shitty Christmas, I declared a personal boycott on Christmas gifts. I now buy gifts only for children, and I buy them books. There are only three children in my life right now (my niece, goddaughter, and godson), so that’s a lucky break for me. I buy them books because I loved books as a kid and they’re all spoiled children who get too many toys and clothes from everyone else.
I hate buying gifts for people, in general. If I see “the perfect thing” for someone at any time of year, I’m more likely to get it for them just because. I don’t need a holiday to do that. And most people don’t need anything. If anyone actually in fact needs anything, they need something like groceries or clothes for children who’ve grown out of what they have and can’t afford anything new. I hate crowds at stores, I hate the bombardment of advertising and BUY BUY BUY OR DIE mentality that happens from September-December. It all just makes me cranky and resentful of a holiday that’s suppose to be enjoyable.
I hate receiving gifts. If I ever need anything for myself, I buy it when I need it. If I can’t afford it, chances are good that no one I know can (or would) afford it for me either. Because of this, people buy me shit I don’t want or need. If I get another scented bath set or candles, I will scream. I do not take baths or light candles (after the cat lit herself on fire one year), and I hate scented things. It is not the thought that counts. If someone gives you something you don’t want or need, they didn’t think of you, they checked you off an obligatory list. I find that more insulting than receiving nothing. Clearly the gift-giver was not thinking of me if s/he bought me a scented bath set. And most people I know don’t have much money. Save your money and buy necessities for yourself, I do not want anything.
Even though I have declared a boycott on gifts and let everyone know this, I still get some gifts from my parents and brother at Christmas. What did I get this year?
A cat calendar. I love my cats, yes. I do not like cat stuff. Cat figurines, funny cat decor, cats on rugs, cats on clothing. I hate all that. Hate it. Why my mother got me a cat calendar, I cannot begin to imagine. I have no cat decor in my house. Calendars are a typical thing I used to get every year, and in the past I’d show my mom what calendars in the store I kind of liked, and she’d pick one to give me. Usually it was something with nature scenes, or Buddhas, or tao sayings. Never, ever a cat calendar.
A CD of slow music for yoga. I don’t do yoga. I don’t listen to CDs. A shitty cheap glass angel figurine. I don’t like knick knacks. Thanks for taking that trip to the dollar store and buying a piece of crap that I’m going to give to Goodwill. Pretty sure my brother’s wife picked that one out.
A deluxe turntable edition of Scrabble. Now this, I really like. I’ve always wanted it. The problem is, I have no one to play Scrabble with. So even though I could have easily bought that game for myself at any time, I never bought it because it’s just going to sit on a shelf and collect dust. Unless I play it against myself, which I might a time or two. So yes I like this gift, but it’s not something I needed.
The gift I got that I did really like is a framed photo of my niece. This is displayed proudly on my tv in the living room. Quite frankly, I would have been quite happy if this was the only gift I got. I love it.
So I’m sure you’re all thinking, what a selfish grinchy bitch. Well, you’re probably right. But I’d rather spend the holidays eating good food and having some good laughs with my family. Not trudging angrily from store to store trying to find something to check someone off a list. Not feigning happiness over a piece of junk I’m going to end up giving to Goodwill. I know some people out there like STUFF, but I do not. Give me food and laughs.
I don’t think that’s grinchy at all. Or, at least I hope not. I feel the exact same way about the whole issue. I hate the whole gift process. I don’t like the forced giving. I don’t like the receiving. I absolutely loathe the fact that from November until usually two days before Christmas, my mother and MIL sit there badgering me about what my husband and I would like for Christmas, and they won’t take “We have everything we need!” for an answer, and if you actually give them something they can buy, they decide it isn’t worthy and buy some other piece of junk.
I think this is why Thanksgiving has become my favorite holiday.
Amen Sista! I am the same way! I make a very modest salary $40K and am saving money for my future goals (home, kids, retirement). The money spent by my relatives on retarded gifts, (i.e. a monogramed satin pajama set) is much better spent on contributing to my downpayment fund. My boyfriend bought me athletic shoes.. that don’t fit and I have wasted 3 days trying to return. He wanted me to “surprise” him on Xmas. Ooooohhh.. No thanks. I asked him what does he need! I am not wasting my time or money trying to guess what you like. Your blog speaks volumes to me and I am a part of my own anti-gift giving xmas/b-day movement unless you really want to pay for my dream spa vacation in colorodo.
I mostly agree. I’ve gotten way too many candles and lotion-type sets over the years and, no, it doesn’t indicate that the giver thought of me. It’s not personal and it could be considered insulting. To top it off, I hate wasting things so the stuff sits around while I never use it because it’s cheap and crappy. Add to that how picky I am about scents and most of those generic “for females” Christmas gifts are going to suck.
But I’m still hopeful that someone will utterly and completely surprise me with something and it doesn’t have to be something big, just something I would actually enjoy. My husband bought me a couple movies that I totally wasn’t expecting and I probably wouldn’t have purchased myself but I liked the surprise and have already watched them. Of course, when I get a crappy gift, I’m uber disappointed.
This is probably why I have such a hard time shopping for people. I want to get them something they’ll really like and can find a use for but I want it to be something they don’t realize they need or want. lol
i’m not a gift giver for christmas. i tend to buy something if/when it reminds me of someone. and it’s not specifically for christmas! :)
[...] I get to gather with family for holiday fun time. That’s what I like best about Christmas. I hate gifts, but I’m all about the family gathering and food. My niece will be 2 years old then too. [...]